Smaugs Layer

Holy Holy Holy Holy Holy Holy Holy Holy Holy Holy Holy Holy HOLY HOLY HOLY HOLY HOLY HOLY HOLY HOLY

2004-05-28T06:07:33Z

Have you ever been at a loss for words and thoughts by the power of the Lord? and the only word that runs in your head is Holy Holy Holy? I have been through an awsome spiritual awakening in the last month.
It all started when I took a fast for the first time. And I mean an actual fast. The very first day.......unspeakable joy. Just UNSPEAKABLE. I want that again. I want it forever. Ohhh the feeling of the hands of God just grasping your heart and entire being! I want to worship, just worship him forver, all day , all night. I don't want to sleep, I don't want earthly food, I don't want anything or anyone. I CAN'T WAIT! Iam ...utterly in love with God.

The Holy Spirit.....is just......ahhhhhhh.......I can't explain it. I love my church I love my God I love my life. I never thought i'd say that. Ohhh I can not wait for Sunday........*jumps with joy*

Yay for Miko Hughes!!!!

2004-05-28T04:50:20Z

C:\My Documents\My Pictures\yaa-020407-669-rclark-mhughes.jpg

Completley idiotic and untrue, but we are amused...claps lightly

2004-01-14T19:24:26Z

Heaven Full, God Sends Newcomers to Hell:

In a move that has shocked religious peoples all over the world, God (a.k.a. Allah, Yaweh, Big Guy) has announced that there is no more room in Heaven, the ultimate paradise destination for all believers. Those arriving at the gates of Heaven will be given a small amount of Heavenbucks for compensation, then sent directly to Hell.
According to St. Peter, a spokesman for God, Heaven has seen its population grow at an increasing rate over the past decade. "With all these professional football players spreading the word of God so effectively after game winning touchdowns and such, coupled with humans' love of having sex, which results in more potential followers, we've seen a huge increase in the number of believers," he said.
"Plus, the rise in gang activity has grown- and gang members love bustin' caps in suburbanites. Of course, Christianity is a current trend among these victims," Peter added.
God's decision to send the Heavenbound to Hell came when he was informed that the population of Heaven has lowered the quality to just-above-paradise levels. In fact, adding one more person to Heaven would affect the living quality of those already there so as to make Heaven merely a near-paradise.
"God simply couldn't go on knowing that all people coming to Heaven would be disappointed that it isn't paradise, as he promised in the 2000-year-old Bible, available wherever books are sold," Peter said. "So rather than allowing people to live in pseudo-paradise, God said, 'Send 'em all to Hell.' That's the kind of guy He is- all or nothing."
Satan (a.k.a. the Devil, Lucifer), an ex-friend of God who runs Hell, is looking forward to the diversity the unexpected Heaven-rejects will bring. "I was getting tired of all these murderers, rapists, and Catholics," he said. "This new blood should mix things up nicely."
Perhaps the most distressing news for the new Hell inhabitants, apart from the eternal agony of fiery stakes driven into their flesh and molten lava poured into their orifices, is the fact that with the current exchange rates, one can only get 0.79 Hellbucks to the Heavenbuck.

I took care of it Harry!

2004-01-13T19:28:10Z

I am watching Dumb and Dumber. Whoo hoo I love this pelicula. I feel like writting in spanish...

Hoy tengo que ir a trabajar. Ento a las 3:00 de la tarde. Me gusta mi trabajo. Es muy agradable. Mis trabajadores son muy hamables. No eh conocido una persona que me ah caido mal.Ahi(sp?) un señor que es muy corajudo. Nunca sonrie. Me da lastima.
Como nadien va a leer esto, aparte de mi, voy a escribir en español para aprender a escribir correctamente. Soy mexicana. Deberia de saber lo. Pero no se muy bien. voy a tomar una clase de español en el colegio. Bueno, asta la proxima.

Oo~ I found this amazing christian radio station.
They play a lot of soothing music. And they also have
scripture readings, book readings and a call-in radio
talk show where a pastor (I think) answers questions
people might have a bout the bible. It's very interesting.
I love the hristian opera they play. It's off the hook yo! ~oO

...................uhhh........ok........................

I'm here, I'm queer, GET USED TO IT!....Ok no I'm not...

2004-01-10T01:47:58Z

I have to go to the potty.

Yay I have finally made it up to the bay area. I like it. It's different.
A LOT OF TRAFFIC.
I started work on Monday, And my manager is already offering me a position as a supervisor! Coolio! That's what I thought at first. It's a lot of responsibility . Well maybe not A LOT. But a lot more than I have now. I'm praying about it, that is the only sure way I can know what to do.

Ok so me and Danny have been hanging out like everyday. And it's very much fun. Yesterday we tried to get lost, but it didn't work. Just as we were going to wonder into a strange neighborhood. We got hungry and ended up going to Popeye's and then to my place to watch a movie about Bruce Lee.Mmmm. So much for an adventure filled night.

Today I applied at school. And now I have to do all kinds of fun little things to get my units transfered. Then I have to pick classes. I am excited to go back to school.

I also found a church today! I am very excited. I can't wait for sunday morning! It will be a much more pleasant experience taking Danny with me. Since I don't have Priscilla and Jorge to go with ( my former church buddy's). I'm super stoked. I hope they have a youth group. I'm thinking of being a youth leader. I'd much rather to missionary work though. We'll see how that goes. OHHHH I am also tickled with joy that I got a raise. I don't want to sound like a gitty retard, but now I have money to contribute to the hungry kids in Ethiopia, and other country's. I hope I can find some good charity groups to work with. That would be splendid.

I am getting hungry, so I am going to go finish off the rest of Danny's food. ha.

Mixed emotions

2003-12-26T03:04:10Z

Well.
It is Jueves, 25 de Diciembre 2003, y son las 6:43p.m de la tarde.
I am at my uncle Marcos' house.In Palmdale cali.mmmm...my old house.
YUM! My uncle just made me some really good pasta stuff, and I like it a lot.Mmm I am very hungry indeed. Anywho...
I'm not too sure how I feel. I know I feel rushed. I have to get so many thngs done before tomorrow afternoon.What am I saying. I have things I need to finish before tonight! I feel stressed.....I feel thin. Like Butter scraped over too much bread. Ok maybe Mr. Baggins was feeling something different, but the point IS I do not feel at ease. I want tomorrow to be over and done with.
I want to be cuddled inside Dannys arms right now. That is the only thing that will make me feel warm and put my mind at rest.
My mom is going to cry, I know it.She already has. I HATE seeing or hearing her cry. That is one of the few things that my tears will not yeild to.Ugghh I wish she would't act like I am going to war. Although, I kinda feel like it.
I miss Danny.
I want to go home.

I feel like killing once more.

2003-12-21T05:07:25Z

I hate being a jealous GF. But I cannot help it.
I hate being human.
I hate lust and lies.
I hate the world. But ironically I love the earth.
I hate the past but can't seem to let it go.
I HATE LUSTFUL THOUGHTS AND WHORE BAG WOMAN.
I hate the fact that I'm not any better than them.
I hate being human.
I hate the perversion of humans.
I can't wait until I'm an immortal soul doing heavens work and not having any memory of this foul place and the things it does to people.
I love people.
But I hate their ways.
I hate the feeling of HATRED!

geez I sound like a loser. I'm calm once more. And glad that I'm human.......... :0)

Now that's a dwarf!

2003-10-28T17:42:18Z

I imagine this is what Thorin looks like.

Zithromax rules!

2003-10-23T20:35:18Z

Hey look it's the medicine I'm taking. The 1 out 5 that actually made me feel better! I only have 2 doses left, ohhhh exciting.

So I was trying to update yeterday.....

2003-10-23T18:52:00Z

.....And, my beautiful computer froze...arrrrrg.
I was going to talk about Everything me and Daniel did when I was up visiting him. Then I realized, I have a good memory. So it would be a novel. And I'm still a little too sick to write that much.

*cough cough *.

I absolutely HATE coughing. I have irregular breathing. I breath fast, and it hurts :0(. My doc. says I have a lung infection. Will thinks I have a type of pneumonia. And Kelly thinks I have bronchitis. I think I need to get better, thats what I think! But the worse is over. And I am excited that I am getting better :0). I have to remember to call Karla.
Karla is great. I met her in Priscilla and Jorges's Art class. She is awsome. I have not spoken to her in a long while. I saw her with her mummy about 2 weeks ago. She said she was doing better and that we should hang out.Karla is sick. Not like physically. I won't speak anymore of it, she didn't give me permission. But I will say this, she is an AMAZING girl. She is sooooooo nice. And has a HUGE heart. And I think she is beautiful.And I know that she was meant for great things. She is an AWSOME artist. I love her art work. I am going to ask her if she still wants to move to San Fran. If she does, that will be great because that will make her the third person, and that means Angela ( Danny's sister) and I can move in , in December. And it also means Karla and I can hang out a lot more and maybe I can make her happier. Yay :0).
OOhhh, I already have a job in San Leandro. The manager of the Office Max there said to just call him a week before I move up there and he will put me on the schedule. That is so exciting. I will miss my people here though. But you know, you got to do, what you got to do.
Danny is my boyfriend. And my best friend. And I miss him greatly. I became used to having him next to me all the time. And doing stuff for me when I was sick :0). Thank you Chicken.I also had a super time wrestling with him and watching movies together and cuddling. I'm excited because I get to do all that and more very very soon. Wow, it's almost time for me to get out of class and haven't done much research. Ok buh bye bye for now.

Danny stinks

2003-10-13T22:57:15Z

SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD!Danny is laying next to me being a stalker.I love you-->
Ok we are gonna go wachar School Of Rock.

P.S Peter licked my nose :0) and Chili stinks like popcorn and sweat.

Sunday morning....

2003-10-05T16:34:12Z

...Ugghhh. My headaches :0(. I did not go to sleep last night until 2: something....
Let's see, where do I start.
Yesterday was the first Saturday I got off! It was also my grandmas 83rd birthday? Yeah, that sounds right. My family and I had lunch at the "Golden Gong," lol. That was around 2:30. Grandma seemed happy to have us all there. Everyone said that I looked "really nice." I didn't fix myself up a whole lot, but more than usual.Cedric, my cousin Steven's son wanted to sit next to "cousin Pita" . He kept on touching me with his food infested hands. And kissing me on the arm. And telling me he had to go potty.
After grandmas b-day party, my cousin Priscilla and I drove to Nipomo,beacuse turns out, she has a boyfriend now. Weird. So, I wanted to meet this James fellow.
He wasn't there.
He had gotten in an argument with his Mom or something, so we decided to drive back to AG(Arroyo Grande). I had promised my cousin Erica that I was going to go to her house yesterday, so I asked Priscilla if she wanted to come. They are not the best of friends. But Priscilla said that she would hang out for a little bit.
She wasn't there.
My aunt Emma, Erica's mother said she was out with her BF Aladdin. OK, Aladdin is not his real name, but he looks a lot like him.lol.Priscilla was hungry so I took her to BK. I called Ally's cell and they said they were at the movies and were going to watch "Underworld." I couldn't remember what that was about, Erica said "It's a movie you'd watch. You should come". So I though "OK." It was 6:30 when I called. And the movie started at 6:50, and I still had to drop off Priscilla at her friends house.
I made it to the theater at about 6:57. There was a LONG line. And I felt different because I was all dressed up and by myself, and people were looking at me. I finally got into the theater, and I couldn't see a thing! I know Erica always sits in the VERY top. Sure enough, she was up there. Hugged up on David (Aladdin). I actually enjoyed the movie. Even though Erica and David were all over eachother. Yucky.

After the movie I picked up Priscilla because she said she wanted to spend the night with me because our moms were going to go clubbin',lol.After the mothers took off, so did we. We were on a manhunt to find James's house. He lives all the way in the boonies. And it was REALLY foggy and hard to find, after a half hour of cell phone directions, we found the place. James is tall, thin and dark. He's very nice. His brothers were smoking weed and getting drunk in the backhouse, and his older brother was staring at the wall. And wouldn't look up. Not even when we walked in to say "HI" I learned later he was a schizo. I really didn't want to be there. I IMMEDIATELY called Daniel for support. He was watching "Toy Story 2". I was jealous.
The boys wanted to go to VONS to buy some beer and stuff. So I told Priscilla to drive, I was too tired. Turns out James likes metal. I put on some In Flames and Demons and Wizards, and he liked it! After we got back, I drank a strawberry wine cooler, watched music videos and ate hot cheetos while everyone was about their business. I called Daniel again. He was still watching "Toy Story 2." We finally headed home at about 1:30am.When we arrived home I sat down on my bed and started singing "Today was A good day" by ice cube. OK no I didn't. I fell asleep. OK time for church...........wow I wrote a lot and I left out soooo much, maybe when I feel better, I will write better.

Ask ... and you shall receive

2003-10-04T16:54:43Z

Yay yay yay! I'm happy! OK heres the story........
I've been wanting to get a tattoo for a while. Nothing big, just a little Jesus fish on my wrist or a "Jesus holding a sword" on my back, or something in elvish,ANYWAY! I've been postponing it because I wasn't sure if it was OK to do. I mean, I wanted it so bad, but if the law says no tattoo's, then no tattoo's it is. But I came across this site "http://www.axxent.ca/~gennaro/Bible_Support/index.html", by complete accident, and I was SOOOOOOOOO happy! :0).

Ahh, I love God. I really do. I mean, most non believers would say it's all a loud of crap, but man, things are SOOO much easier when you are a Christian. And notice that I said when YOU are a Christian, do not take this statement and run with it and interpret it as "God loves Christians more than non-Christian" that couldn't be farther from the truth and anyone who tells you that is full of it!

OK, you have to remember that our God (and when I say OUR God I do mean YOU and I) is a God of free will. He will NOT force himself on you. Christians might, and WILL force Him on you. But when can you honestly say that God forced himself on you? God isn't going to go around following you and saying "Oh please worship me!" He is greater than that, he doesn't need to beg you for anything, he doesn't need YOUR pity! NOW this doesn't mean that your love isn't important to him, it is. It's just as important as the love of Jesus to him. Remember we are ALL his children, and a parent doesn't have favorites. A human parent might. But God does not.

When I said "things are SOOO much easier when you are a Christian." I meant this:
God doesn't stray away from you. You stray away from him. And if you say, " Oh well where was God when I broke my arm?" or "Where was God when my dad died?" God is always there. But where were you? Where you living according to his will? Or were you doing whatever you pleased? You see, when we stray away from God. He can't reach us. And you might say. " Well God is supposed to be almighty" He is, but AGAIN, he is also a God of free will. If we show him, we don't want his help, and do not call out and ask for his help. He won't help. Simple as that!
He gave you a mouth and the free will to say
"God help me" or to not say it. If you don't believe me, heres what Jesus said......John 16:24 "Hitherto you have not asked any thing in my name. Ask, and you shall receive; that your joy may be full"
You see, you have to ask God. You can't just expect him to do everything. He gave you a brain. So use it. He gave you mouth. So ask him to help you. Don't go around cursing him because your life sucks. Did you come to him and say "God I give my life to you and I will serve you, please help me" and he said "No, because you're not a Christian!" God's not a bratty little kid. And how are you to become Christian if God doesn't allow it? It's impossible, that's why he is forgiving and is willing to wipe the slate clean, if you just ASK!

I asked for the answer to my question "Are tattoos OK with you?", and look, I received the answer. It's that simple. God, unlike humans, CAN read your mind, and knows if you want his help or not. But God is loyal to his word, and he is a gentlemen. He won't do anything you don't ask of him.

CHANFLE!

2003-10-01T16:16:31Z

One hardcore gangster........

Hey look I'm concided

2003-09-30T18:31:36Z

http://f2.pg.photos.yahoo.com/daveysmoose

these are my yahoooOooOooOOoo albums. And they are all of me ... :/. Umm I will upload some pix of me and Danny, and of familia later.But for now, this is what I have.I hope thi slink works.

Today...I am trying to fix the way I feel

2003-09-30T18:07:48Z

ok.
My fingers want to whine. But my heart tells me not to give into self pity.
If today started off bad.Instead of letting it get me down,and staying at home doing nothing all day and posting about how much my life sucks and talk about poor little me and my pathetic little problems I might have.I am going to think about someone else for a change.
I am going to compare my problems with the problems of abused children,people suffering form fatal illnesses,people who have experienced a loss of a loved one.Children who awoke this morning not knowing a family.Not knowing if they will have anything to eat today besides the rotten apple they might have found lying in the garbage.
In contrast to all this. My problems seem unimportant . And I am angry at myself that I could let such an insignificant thing such as not wanting to be at school upset me and ruin my day.

I should be rejoicing that I even WOKE UP this morning! That I had a warm clean place to sleep.That when I opened my eyes this morning I had sight to see the beautiful moring God has given us.That I had food to put in my mouth. That I had the ability to hear when my mother told me she loved me and hoped I had a good day. That I had legs to walk with.That I have a truck to commute with. That I HAVE the opportunity to attend school and better my life!

Ok I know who ever is reading this is probably thinking I am on a God high or something. I just felt so bad for feeling bad. When you sit and think of other peoples problems,you feel selfish and stupid for being a baby about something that is not even a big deal.I thank God that I didn't give into my self pity.I am going to try and be less selfless and more loving and open to others needs.So I will get on with my classwork now and do the best I can. For I have been given talents that some may not posses, so I will use what God gave me.

Deuteronomy 26:11 - "And thou shalt rejoice in every good thing which the LORD thy God hath given unto thee, and unto thine house, thou, and the Levite, and the stranger that is among you."

To jog, or not to jog?

2003-09-28T15:55:02Z

It's 8:46 am. I could go jog. I just did Winsor Pilates. So, I don't really HAVE to jog. I have a headache. I usually always do when I work out in the morning. That is the only true reason why I am dicouraged to go. The last time I jogged. I felt awful. My head was pounding and I felt like throwing up.I feel fat. I have an hour and 38 minutes before church. So I bes make up my mind NOW.Ok. I asked God, and I think he said yes?My headache is gone. Cool.:0). And this Gypsy music is pumping me up. lol

I'm jealous

2003-09-28T00:19:16Z

I HATE FOOD!

2003-09-25T16:54:53Z

Man. I was so going to stick to the Atkins diet. And then I found out it's a whole bunch of baloga.So, since I was off the diet I decided that a sweet roll wouldn't hurt. So then I had another. And then I wanted to kill myself.
So last night after work. I walk outside with my supervisor Kelly, and I notice a car next to my truck.Which struck me as strange considering there are a million empty parking spots, and this car was parked next to mine all the way in the boonies.It looked like Jorge and Priscillas car ( My buddy's). At first I became worried. Don't ask me why, but when things happen unexpectedly, it makes me uncomfortable. As I walked closer, I could tell that it in fact was them.Priscilla smiled and waved. I felt a bit of relief. As I approached ,Jorge stuck his head out of the car, and with a still lingering worry over my head I said "Hey, whats up?" To my relief they asked if I wanted to come over and watch movie. So I called up my mum, and Danny to let them know I was going to be a little late tonight.
When we arrived at thier tiny little studio. I felt good. "Jeez, I haven't been here in like 20 million years!". Jorge responded in a predictable manner by saying " Yeah, some Friend you are!" We walked inside. I felt peace. Tetra, their kitty was looking at me curiously. She'd grown. As I walked into their room/living room, I noticed they still had my famous "Crayon Picture" on their entertainment center. It was a picture I had taken in pre-school.Everyone who knew me and was fond of me had that picture. It displayed me as a 4 1/2 year old ,tan, oriental looking little girl. Wearing a traditional blue mexican dress, with clear slippers and white socks, Holding up a giant red crayon. With an equally large crayon box behind me.

We decided on "gangs Of New York". I loved that movie.

My whole point of this journal was to depict how pissed I was that I had eaten 2 sweet rolls, and a bunch of chips. I strayed quite a bit. Now I've run out of time and my story is incomplete. Now I must go, with an awful taste in my mouth of unfinished business. Ugghh.

LOL

2003-09-23T18:43:51Z

Ok, First I'd like to say that I do not condone swearing,but I found this amusing, and I knew that most of you would appreciate it. DANIEL!

Danny and Lupita

2003-09-23T07:23:46Z

Angerfacation....

2003-09-22T20:42:13Z

Arrgggish! What the "F" is going on with muh mudafrakin' pic? Oh well. Mmm, I spell delightful. If I was someone else, I would hug me right now.I love the feeling of your own skin when you get just shower. Warm and soft. Umm someone just IM'd me. And he keeps on saying "ORALES". Mother of Abraham Lincoln! I must finish getting ready for work....:0/. I don not feel like working an 8 hour shift today. Oh well, more mula in my pocket. I'm new to all this mumbo jumbo, how do I post pix on my journal ents?Okie, it is now a buck 40 and I must head for work. Buh bye bye for now.

Sunday is a fun day...meh

2003-09-21T17:30:54Z

10:20am.Go to church. Or not go to church. That is the question. In one hand I have my self indulgances in sloth. In the other, risking having a horrible week.And missing an awsome message. Pastor Bloom is rad. Nothing like your typical pastor.PCC is awsome. You can show up wearing a misfits t-shirt,puffy black skirt,knee high combat boots and the only thing you'll hear is " Lupita!...I can't beleive you would show up here looking like that! You forgot you ripped panty hoes!" Ok, my mind is made up. I am going to church! It's better to be late than burn in hell. Lol I love that joke......ha...cough.....ok I'm out.

Night stalker

2003-09-21T10:19:00Z

Late.It's late. Or is it early? depends on how you look at things. I say, It's early. Real early. Any who. My feet are cold, and falling asleep. Maybe I should follow their example.I need knew ear phones.These hurt *rubs ear*I feel like running outside, hopping into my truck and taking off.
Man,has it been that long? Nah, only 3 months.Yeah, I saw Danny 3 months ago. But it's all good in th hood, I'm going to visit him for his bifday. October 10th :0). Yay for me. Ok, I want to get back to talking to muh bebe.Good noches.

Journal #1

2003-09-21T08:37:50Z

It's 1:36am, and, this is my first entry.